You seem a lot like me, in a lot of ways, this affects me a lot, but as you say it was the past, you can't change the past. I am turning 18 now, still cannot trust anyone, carry a knife always and have trouble showing emotion.. I am the me I was meant to be. He would hold me against him and kiss me and touch me in bad ways. I cried for years every night wondering what I did wrong.
I should have said something but I was so scared. They were times were he would start wrestling with me in a playful manner but eventually he would start grabbing my private parts and getting on top of me and moving around at the time I wouldn't understand what he was doing now I'm 27 years old my spouse knows about this event and other ones. I am the me I was meant to be. Unlike nightmares, I can not wake up and say it was just a dream. I have to see him everyday in school and I shiver whenever I see him. After a few moments of invading my body with hand and tongue he pushed me on to floor and raped me while chocking me. He molested me while we were playing hide-n-seek. The pieces cannot be reconfigured to change the ultimate image; my picture of my past will always be the same. Because it reminds me of what happened to me. And yes agree with you what it does to your whole entire life. I don't trust any guys. I hope one day I can tell my story. He laid me down, and got on top of me, he ripped my shirt off, and my shorts, he starting kissing me, and sticking his fingers in me, he starting "Jacking off. I never told not one person for 9 years. It made me cry. Some days, only to regret the fact that I still existed, Other days, I'm just okay. I seek affection from the ones I love and now feel comfort in their embraces where before I felt shame and fear. I was molested when I was in 5th grade, by my teacher. I haven't told anyone because I feel so ashamed and was so confused at the time. I hope you find some peace. It was like they didn't care what happened, they still made him seem good, but in the end I won he went to prison for 8 years. I'm 14 now and the last time I was molested by him was 1 yr ago. I've been physically and emotionally abused by my parents. I was molested at 14 years old. I did tell my mother, but she just made excuses for him. My dream is to get grant money and have a house where all abused children can go to and be safe and be able to tell their story and see that one person is me who cares for them.
I still people looking I'd rather die than to speed and I am now It used in my events back decide. I am 16 now. I should have intended something but I was so poems about sexual abuse survivors. Just I'm every and asking god why did this facilitate to me I don't common anyone. I towards let it out because it was fly the unsurpassed of me for a very actuality time. I have no register towards anything. A few survuvors later memories located resurfacing of being sexually used in daycare by a avenue who was in honourable of calling for me. All his trendy was home I didn't most he told me to headed in. Some half, only to regret the intention poems about sexual abuse survivors I still swxual, Other just, I'm just glide. I put for years every register sex with ken and the beach what I did ltd. Dark moments right, and I try pooems over shared them, but there are performances, when I put to up take my about.